Life as an expatriate

There are many different ways to live as an expat in a foreign country and within the expat communities in some of the the countries I have visited, I have noticed a lot of criticism and judgment of one another. 

Some expats seek each other out. Yesterday we drove past one guy who waved immediately upon seeing us. 

Others stick to their cliques and avoid eye contact altogether. A couple nights ago, we went to a karaoke bar and we spoke with many friendly strangers there, but none were expats. 

The most common discussion among the expat community is not about who is waving to one another but rather what type of lifestyle each other has created for themselves. 

Most expats identify their way of living with one of two main categories: 

1. "Living like the locals"

2. "Living comfortably"

For the sake of this blog, I will only classify the two ways of living but want to make it clear that these are certainly not the only ways. 

"Living like the locals" typically assumes that an expat is staying in a rural village out in the middle of nowhere, with no running water, no electricity and the toilet situation...I won't even describe. 

This way of life is chosen by expats that think all "locals" live in such conditions and while many of them feel like they have an upper-hand in the expat circles when it comes to learning about the culture of any given country - and they may - they often don't realize that they are lumping everyone from one country into one group. The very phrase, "living like the locals," which many NGOs encourage, is impossible to achieve. That is unless you are switching your way of life every day to try various types of food, live in various styles of housing, stay in the city and rural areas, and so on. If saying you are "living like the locals" equates to you that you are living in discomfort, you probably deserve it. 

On the flip side, many expats like to "live comfortably." These groups of people often have nice, big houses that are gated off, some with guards and they often have cars. These expats are often perceived by other expats as not fully integrating themselves into a new country and that they likely don't know any nationals, which is nearly impossible. 

When I am living in a new city, I like to explore it, take the public transit, walk around, meet new people, but I also like to be able to go home and have a shower or relieve myself into something a bit more structured than a hole in the ground (yes, I have tried it. No, I don't like it).

Regardless of the life an expat chooses to live while abroad, the fact is that in most cases they have all chosen to live that way. Whether living in a house with a grass roof or in a house with a barb-wire-lined wall around it, the choice is up to the individual so despite the decision, it would be great if everyone stopped the pretentious comments about knowing better than everyone else. 

The fact is, most will go back to their home countries eventually and either live in a massive house or a tiny apartment, not by choice but as a result of the economic situation they have built for themselves - just like everyone else in the world.